Well, I knew it couldn’t last. Hubby was up to his old tricks again this past week. More interesting observations came out of that man’s mouth the last seven days than I could count! But his “best” came a few days ago when I told him I planned on working on the blog all day long. He immediately said I should write a post: Tips on how to be a better wife, and he further continued with, “I could help you with that!”
And then the Cheshire cat grin came out.
Needless to say that in the end, that crack wasn’t worth it to him. They seldom are. You’d think he’d learn, but nooooooo …
This came just a few days after he took Max for a walk around the community and Hubby found a dead river rat by one of the canals. Hubby being Hubby, immediately snapped a picture of the dead rodent with his phone. Then, when he got home he said something to me like, “Hey, want to see a picture?” And I, foolishly assuming it was a photo of a bird, said, “Sure!” And then he showed me the picture of that dead rat – and to say it was most disturbing to me, is an understatement.
And then Hubby wondered why I refused to take Max for a walk the rest of the day.
WTF did he think would happen when he showed me that picture and told me I walked right by that dead rodent earlier in the day!?!?! He knows I hate rats.
And Hubby’s way of offering me comfort on my next walk with Max? “Don’t worry, I doubt that rat body will last long, something out there will eat it.”
Oh yeah, now that’s reassuring!!
Maybe what we really need here is a list of Tips On How To Be A Better Husband. You won’t find “show your musophobic wife a picture of a dead rat” anywhere on that list.
For more in the Crap My Hubby Says/Does series on Ann’s Entitled Life, click here.
Stephanie K says
Haha! My husband would love for me to read “Tips On How To Be A Better Wife”, but he knows better than to suggest it!
My husband knows that while I prepare and eat venison, I just can’t stand to see a carcass. So what does he do every year? Figures out a new way to make me look at a picture of him and his “prize”. I will say that he has come up with a few good ones, like sending it to me in an email labeled as something that I wouldn’t suspect or taking a bunch of pictures of the kids, but putting his right in the middle or getting it printed then nesting it in with our normal photo albums. Sorry you had to see the rat, but I really do feel your pain! 🙂
Ann says
Shhhhhhh don’t give Hubby any ideas on a deer carcass pic, Stephanie! I am also not thrilled to see poor dead Bambi, yet Hubby has to show me the pictures. Blech.
Ann
Shell says
I knew he wouldn’t let you down for long! According to my stepdad, his advice for men to have a long and happy marriage, you need to know just two words – Yes dear. Works in most any situation. There is your entire article for how to be a better husband 🙂
Ann says
Your stepdad is smart, Shell!
Ann
Barbee says
If my husband said that to me, I’d laugh my head off. Why are you not laughing at that?
Didn’t it used to be Funny things my husband says?
(Ok, the rat pic was mean, but still just a harmless prank.)
Here’s some suggestions:
Tip #1: Express your sense of humor. 🙂
Tip #2: Learn how to ‘prank’ him back.
Ann says
Most of the time I laugh and shake my head at him. If I laugh too hard, I just encourage him, Barbee. The rat picture really and truly freaked me out.
I don’t “do” pranks though, and never have, even as a kid. I think they are pretty mean for the most part.
Ann
Barbee says
You have GOT to find a way to do payback.
(Avoiding divorcee-of course)
Payback in a playful manner. I honestly believe he’s trying to play w/ you.
(Oh and you just KNOW when he said he could help w/ tips for being a better wife it was all about sex. Monica Lewinsky sex. LOL)
Play is good. Even in advanced years, ‘play’ keeps you healthy. Stay young and awesome! Play.
Ann says
Oh I know he thinks he’s funny… and believe me, he “paid” for the rat pic – he’s the one that took Max out for two days after showing me that. LOL
Ann
Amy says
Your hubby cracks me up!
One night my husband was trying to compliment me in his own way. He told me that he was so glad that I came into his life because he was really tired of dating those dumb pretty girls. Talk about a back handed compliment!
Ann says
LOL Amy. He meant he was glad he married the beautiful, smart woman. 🙂
Your husband can hire me as his PR agent. 😛
Ann